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THEORY OF THE WINGMAN

THEORY OF THE WINGMAN

NB: THIS WAS AN EMAIL THAT I JUST EDITED A BIT. Thought it was quite good actually. It is PG-Rated.

Army Special Forces (Green Berets)
Army Special Forces (SF) are commonly referred to as “Green Berets.
They are strategic, multipurpose forces capable of rapid response to various contingencies throughout the world.
Their mission is to organize, train, equip, and direct indigenous forces in unconventional warfare and foreign internal defense. For this reason, they possess foreign language and area orientation skills
I recieved an email the other day about the Role of a Wingman out in the field. In the airforce you never leave your Wingman. Never. In life I was the Flight Leader and on many occasions a Wingman. So I prepared a little Manifesto as Im sure the owes on the Blog will be hitting the Kaap,Durbs, The Palms at some point
The Wingman is argueably the noblest and bravest creature to ever step into a Skit,rik,holiday,bar room whatever.
Who else with cavalier disregard for his personal reputation is willing to throw himself upon the cruel mercies of a brazen man-hater, just so he can cgive the through ball to his puttner. Who Else will dance with the unknown that can be so bad that no amount of liquor will wash the stain from his memory. Who else will stand in the deepest depths of hell so a budy can climb his back and look into Heaven?
WHAT A WINGMAN DOES
And just as that brave(some say suicidally insane) Spartan King and his hundred warriors laid down their lives against a hundred thousand Persions so WILL THE WINGMAN, with the right amount of Prodding, recklessly lunge into battle against foes twice his size and half his interlect, fully knowing there is no way in hell the night will end well
It usually goes down like this
The Flight Leader (Your bra) spots an attractive chic (BT-THE BOMBING TARGET) at the waterfront. But we all know she is not alone………………………………………………………….
She has a tragically less attractive friend known as the CB-COCK BLOCKER.
They seem so close that the Target is unlikely to abandon the Cock Blocker.
The Flight leader knows that he wont successfully complete his bombing run on the target without sufficient air cover and this is where the Wingman comes into play
The Wingman will engage the Cock Blocker and pin her down long enough for the Flight Leader to finish his run, and hopefully bomb his target to the bedroom
Of course theres much more to the task than distracting the cock blocker while the Flight Leader makes his move.
Wingman skills have been honed and passed down since someone decided women should be allowed into bars. Strategies have evolved and tactics have been polished to the point where a WINGMAN has become a super specialised warrior in the eternal battle of sexes. And like all specialists, theve developed their own lingo
THE RISKS
However there are a few risks involved in being a WINGMAN.
Sometimes its as innocuous as enduring dull conversation or getting pasta thrown in his face. Sometimes his public reputation becomes so mangled he cannot fly in the same theater of operations
Sometimes he will get locked in such a steep dive he cant pull up in time to save himself from crash landing in a CB’s bed
The experience can shatter him completely, taking him off the duty roster for weeks, sometimes months, Some never come back.
Worst of all sometimes the Wingman goes in so deep into enemy territory that he will go native and develop strange tastes in women
Bottom Line is a Wingman is a memeber of the Special Forces and can be inserted anywhere anytime at anyplace. They are part of the Green Berets, Seals and will stand with the Volende bra through thick & Thin, Sick & Sin.
In My time I served with a great platoon of special Forces and there are still a few marines left………….
But to be part of this specialised Unit You needed to have the thousand yard stare and the following qualities
1. Without hesitation he will except any mission given to him, no matter how imposible it may seem
2. He will never show interest in the Target
3. “NO cock blocker is so beastly or boring I pomise I will engage her in stunning conversation”
4.Gallantly he will engage any enemy no lie is too large ,no shame too great, no cock blocker to difficult to deter
5. He must not worry about his reputation
6. He must and always be willing to back up any lie a flight leader tells
7. NEVER AND I MEAN NEVER ABANDON YOUR FLIGHT LEADER. SEE THE MISSION THROUGH EVEN IF IT MEANS WAKING UP WITH A BUFFALO
I HAVE HAD GREAT WINGMEN IN MY TIME.TO ALL MY WINGMEN AND FELLOW WINGMEN THIS ARTICLE IS DEDICATED TO ALL WINGMEN WHO HAVE DIED AND FOUGHT IN BATTLES PAST AND PRESENT
SWOOSH
113 th Marine Regiment
GREEN BERET UNIT
SPECIAL FORCES
*This is Copyright to Swoosh0018. You Seen it here first.

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Comments (9)

  • Foreign Minister
    April 25, 2007 at 12:57 pm Reply

    Salute to you and Platoon!
    Signing off…
    Special force
    Foreign Minister

  • Anonymous
    April 25, 2007 at 1:00 pm Reply

    Swoosh

    ????????

    What the fuck ???

    Get a life…

  • Anonymous
    April 25, 2007 at 1:32 pm Reply

    To the anonymous fella who does not understand the meaning and value of a wingmen, it is you who needs to get a life coz if you had one in the first place you would have understood the necessity of the very existence of those noble soles who risk life, limb and izzet for their buddies satisfaction….

  • Naeem The Red Devil
    April 25, 2007 at 4:37 pm Reply

    anonymous, u sound like u could be elton john, u smaak to dive head first into shit neh? what a fucking life you have…shame 🙁

  • Anonymous
    April 25, 2007 at 9:36 pm Reply

    3rd comment

    Spoken like a true Wingman

    Semper Fi

  • Air Force 1
    April 26, 2007 at 5:53 am Reply

    if you didnt have a wingmen than you prob a fag! but than you could me F@#kin your wingman!

  • AIR FORCE 1
    April 26, 2007 at 5:55 am Reply

    if you didnt have a wingmen than you prob a fag! but than you could be F@#kin your wingman!

  • Anonymous
    April 26, 2007 at 9:17 am Reply

    swoosh, salute! i have a question, but before that i need to paint a picture first… back in ‘nam, me n my buddy wer trippin mofo’s wen we wer alerted to a ‘target’ and the ‘CB’…by the rules of engagment that had panned out i was designated wingman….being nite time and considering our nite vision was disabled (really, mofo’s), we approached with caution. i wont lie, the strangest thing happened rite then….the target ended up being worse then the CB and my buddy inadvertantly turned out to be the wingmen… and also my CB wasnt that bad afterall (no stunner tho). my question is, even tho we aborted the mission, do those duties that passed telepathically from A to B become obligatory or are they at the discretion of the original flight leader?? 🙂 over an out…

  • Anonymous
    April 26, 2007 at 10:24 am Reply

    Swoosh you cheat. in all my time u never were a wingman for me! why?

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